The Hidden Costs of Social Media: How It Impacts Youth Mental Health

Social media has become an everyday part of growing up — a digital playground where teens and tweens socialize, express themselves, and stay connected. But behind the filters and hashtags, many young people are silently struggling with the hidden pressures of life online.

Let’s talk about the real impacts of social media on youth mental health, and what parents and caregivers can do to support healthier digital habits.

The Comparison Trap

Platforms like Instagram, TikTok, and Snapchat often promote unrealistic beauty standards, curated lifestyles, and highlight reels of others’ lives. For a developing teen brain, constantly comparing themselves to influencers or even peers can lead to:

• Low self-esteem

• Body dissatisfaction

• Anxiety and depression

What may start as scrolling for fun can quickly become a cycle of self-criticism.

Sleep & Screen Time Struggles

Teens often scroll late into the night, responding to messages or checking likes. Studies have shown that:

• Increased screen time is linked to sleep disturbances

• Poor sleep can worsen emotional regulation and concentration

• Lack of downtime may increase risk for burnout and mood swings

When social media becomes constant, rest and reflection take a backseat.

Cyberbullying and Online Harassment

While bullying used to end at the school gate, today it can follow youth home. Social media can amplify cruelty through:

• Anonymous messages

• Exclusion from group chats

• Public shaming or “canceling”

This type of digital harassment can have deep emotional consequences, especially for teens already struggling with identity or belonging.

Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

Social media fosters a constant fear of being left out. Teens may feel:

• Pressured to post or perform to stay relevant

• Anxious when friends hang out without them

• Stressed about replying instantly or keeping up appearances

This creates an overwhelming sense of always being “on”, which can feel exhausting and isolating.

Mental Health Red Flags to Watch For

If you’re concerned about a child or teen, look for:

• Withdrawal from friends or activities

• Constant checking of notifications

• Irritability when screen time is limited

• Sleep issues or fatigue

• Sudden changes in mood, eating, or appearance

These may be signs that social media is negatively impacting their mental health.

Algorithmic Addiction — The Science of Hooking Teens

One of the most insidious and lesser-known dangers of social media is how it’s designed to be addictive—particularly to the still-developing brains of adolescents.

Built Like a Slot Machine

Social media platforms use algorithm-driven content loops that function much like slot machines. Every time a teen opens Instagram, TikTok, or Snapchat, they’re rewarded with a variable hit of content that’s unpredictable yet instantly gratifying. This random reward system triggers the brain’s dopamine response, reinforcing the behaviour.

Over time, this builds into a cycle of compulsive checking, scrolling, and posting, especially in youth whose brains are wired for novelty, risk-taking, and peer approval.

Did You Know? Studies show that social media lights up the same brain areas as gambling and substance use, especially in adolescents.

Teens Are Especially Vulnerable

The adolescent brain is still developing its prefrontal cortex—the part responsible for impulse control, decision-making, and long-term planning. This makes teens more susceptible to addictive design features, such as:

• Infinite scroll

• Push notifications

• Likes and streaks

• Personalized content feeds

These features are not neutral; they are engineered to maximize time on screen, regardless of mental or emotional cost.

Doomscrolling and Dopamine Burnout

Many teens get stuck in “doomscrolling” loops—passively consuming negative or anxiety-inducing content late at night. This habit not only disturbs sleep and worsens mood but can blunt the brain’s dopamine response over time, leading to:

• Reduced motivation

• Mood swings

• Increased sensitivity to stress

• Decreased enjoyment of offline activities

Warning Signs of Algorithmic Addiction in Youth

Watch for signs like:

• Panic or irritability when separated from their phone

• Compulsive checking during meals, school, or social events

• Decreased interest in hobbies or time with family

• Difficulty sleeping due to nighttime scrolling

How Parents and Caregivers Can Help

1. Open the Conversation
   Create a safe space to talk about what they’re seeing and feeling online — without judgment.

2. Set Tech Boundaries Together
   Collaborate on limits that work for your family. Consider device-free meals or wind-down routines.

3. Model Healthy Habits
   Kids notice how adults use their phones too. Try being mindful of your own screen time.

4. Prioritize Sleep and Real-Life Social Time Poor sleep and loneliness amplify the need for digital escapism. Create routines that support:

   • A regular bedtime without screens an hour before sleep

   • Face-to-face time with friends or family (even just walks or shared meals)

5. Know When to Seek Help
   A counsellor can help teens build self-worth, cope with anxiety, and navigate social pressures — online and offline.

You’re Not Alone

The digital world is changing fast, and it’s okay to feel overwhelmed as a parent. If your teen is struggling with the mental load of social media, we’re here to help.

At Kristen Holbrook Counselling, we support youth and families through compassionate, evidence-based therapy in Coquitlam and online across BC.

Ready to Talk?

Our counsellors can help you take steps to towards a healthier balance with technology.

Managing Stress and Burnout: Tools from a Registered Counsellor in Coquitlam

In today’s fast-paced world, stress is more than just an occasional inconvenience—it’s something many of us live with every day. Whether it’s work pressure, parenting challenges, or emotional fatigue, stress can build up and lead to burnout. As registered counsellors in Coquitlam, we see how chronic stress can impact mental, emotional, and physical health. But the good news is: support and relief are possible.

What’s the Difference Between Stress and Burnout?

Stress is your body’s natural response to pressure. It can be short-term (like preparing for a big meeting) or chronic (such as constant job demands). Stress often feels like you’re juggling too much—but still hopeful that you can manage it.

Burnout, on the other hand, is a state of emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion caused by prolonged stress. It’s more than just feeling tired—it’s feeling depleted, disconnected, and numb. Common signs of burnout include:

• Chronic fatigue or lack of motivation

• Feeling emotionally drained

• Increased irritability or detachment

• Reduced performance or productivity

• Trouble sleeping or frequent illness

If you relate to these signs, know that you’re not alone—and there are proven strategies that can help.

Tools to Manage Stress and Prevent Burnout

Here are several therapist-recommended strategies you can begin using today:

1. Set Healthy Boundaries

Saying “no” can be difficult, especially for people who are highly driven or empathetic. But without clear boundaries, we overextend ourselves. Begin by identifying your limits and communicating them clearly—both at work and at home.

2. Schedule Rest—Not Just Sleep

Intentional rest isn’t laziness—it’s essential. Create time in your week for things that recharge you: reading, walking in nature, listening to music, or simply doing nothing.

3. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness helps you reconnect with the present moment, instead of ruminating over the past or worrying about the future. Try short mindfulness exercises like:

• Deep breathing (inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 6)

• Body scans to check in with how you’re feeling

• Mindful walks where you notice your surroundings intentionally

4. Recognize and Challenge Negative Thoughts

Burnout often comes with self-critical or hopeless thoughts like “I can’t keep up” or “I’m not doing enough.” A counsellor can help you recognize these thought patterns and learn healthier ways of thinking through Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) techniques.

5. Seek Support—You Don’t Have to Do It Alone

Talking to a trained professional can provide relief, perspective, and a plan to move forward. Counselling offers a safe space to process what you’re going through, identify stressors, and build resilience.

How Counselling Can Help

At our Coquitlam counselling practice, we support individuals experiencing stress and burnout through a compassionate, evidence-based approach. Whether you’re overwhelmed by work, struggling with emotional exhaustion, or simply feeling “not yourself,” therapy can help you reconnect with your strengths and develop tools for lasting change.

Some of the approaches we use include:

• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

• Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR)

• Solution-Focused Therapy

• Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT) for relationship-related stress

Ready to Take the Next Step?

If you’re feeling burnt out or overwhelmed, you don’t have to navigate it alone. Our team of Registered Clinical Counsellors (RCCs) in Coquitlam offers individual counselling both in-person and online, tailored to your unique needs.

Located in the heart of Coquitlam and proudly serving the Tri-Cities area, we’re here to support your journey to wellness.

Book a Free Consultation Today

You deserve support, rest, and balance. Learn more about our counsellors or schedule a free phone consultation and take the first step toward feeling better.