Finding the Right Counsellor: A Quick Guide
How to Choose the Right Counsellor: Find clarity, connection, and the support that’s right for you.
Choosing a counsellor is one of the most important steps in your mental health journey. Whether you're seeking support for anxiety, depression, trauma, relationship issues, or personal growth, the right counselling relationship can make all the difference. But with so many options out there, how do you know who’s the right fit?
In this guide, we’ll walk you through the key considerations to help you choose the right counsellor for your needs.
1. Understand Why You’re Seeking Counselling
Before you begin your search, take a moment to reflect on what you’re hoping to get out of counselling. Are you looking for help with a specific issue like grief or stress? Do you need someone with expertise in trauma-informed care or neurodiversity? Knowing what you're seeking will help narrow down your choices.
2. Check Qualifications and Experience
Not all counsellors are the same. Look for someone who is professionally trained, registered with a recognized body (such as the BCACC), and has experience working with the concerns you’re facing. Don’t hesitate to ask about their background, areas of expertise, or counselling approach.
3. Consider Their Counselling Style and Approach
Counselling can take many forms — Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), EMDR, Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Client-Centered Therapy, and more. Some counsellors are more directive, while others focus on reflective listening and emotional support. Read about their approach and ask yourself whether that style resonates with you.
4. Think About Practical Factors
Logistics matter. Consider:
Location – Do you prefer in-person sessions or online counselling?
Availability – Can they accommodate your schedule?
Cost – Does the session fee align with your budget?
The right counsellor will meet you where you are both practically and emotionally.
5. Trust the Connection
No matter how qualified a counsellor is, the relationship matters most. Do you feel heard, understood, and safe? The therapeutic alliance (the connection between client and counsellor) is one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes in counselling.
Many counsellors offer a free initial phone consultation. Use this time to ask questions, share what you're hoping for, and get a sense of whether the connection feels right.
6. Don’t Be Afraid to Change Counsellors
If you’ve started counselling and it doesn’t feel like a good fit, that’s okay. Finding the right counsellor is sometimes a process. You deserve a space where you feel respected, understood, and supported.
Final Thoughts
Finding the right counsellor can feel overwhelming, but it’s a powerful act of self-care. Take your time, trust your instincts, and remember that you are worthy of support that truly meets your needs.
If you're ready to explore counselling options and want to learn more about our counsellors’ approaches click here. To book an initial consultation with any of our counsellors click here. We’re here to help you find clarity, healing, and growth — at your pace.
What Are the Real Benefits of EMDR Therapy? Here’s What to Know
Struggling to move past old memories or anxious thoughts? EMDR therapy offers a unique, research-backed way to help your brain heal from emotional wounds. In this post, we break down benefits of EMDR and why so many people are turning to it for relief, clarity, and lasting change.
If you've been dealing with anxiety, trauma, or just feel stuck emotionally, you might’ve heard about EMDR therapy. At first glance, it might sound a little odd, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing?
But don’t let the technical name fool you. EMDR is actually a powerful (and surprisingly approachable) way to work through tough experiences and get some real relief. Let's break it down and talk about the actual, real-life benefits of EMDR.
So What Is EMDR?
It’s a therapy method that helps your brain reprocess traumatic or distressing memories in a healthier way so they don’t have the same emotional charge they once did. It’s like your brain’s way of finally finishing the “processing” on experiences it got stuck on.
Think of EMDR like your brain’s way of clearing out old emotional “files” that never quite got closed properly. These can be anything from a traumatic event to a smaller, painful memory that still lingers.
During an EMDR session, a therapist helps you revisit the memory in a safe, controlled way while using bilateral stimulation with eye movements, tapping, or sounds. It’s not magic, but it’s pretty amazing how effective it can be.
The Benefits of EMDR (And Why People Swear by It)
1. You Don’t Have to Talk Through Everything
This is one of the reasons many people love EMDR. Unlike traditional talk therapy, you don’t have to explain every detail of what happened. EMDR focuses more on how the memory feels and helps your brain process it in the background.
If you’re not ready (or just not the talky type), this can be a huge relief.
2. It Can Work Faster Than Traditional Talk Therapy
Some people notice changes after just a few sessions. Of course, everyone’s different, but EMDR often helps people feel real progress a lot quicker than they expected especially when it comes to old trauma or deeply rooted beliefs.
3. It’s Not Just for Trauma
While EMDR is best known for helping with PTSD, it can also used for many other presenting issues such as:
Anxiety
Panic attacks
Phobias
Grief
Low self-worth
Stress from difficult relationships
Negative self-beliefs
Basically, if there’s a memory or belief that feels “stuck” and keeps messing with your present, EMDR might help loosen its grip.
4. You Can Finally Feel Free From the Past
One of the most powerful benefits of EMDR is how it helps you change your relationship with painful memories. After working through them, most people say the memories are still there, but they don’t hurt anymore, they have less “emotional charge” and they are not triggered by them in the same way.
5. It Builds Real Resilience
EMDR doesn’t just help you heal old wounds, it also helps you feel more grounded in who you are now. You might find it easier to handle stress, be present in your relationships, and stop second-guessing yourself all the time.
Thinking About Trying It?
The idea of therapy can feel intimidating, especially if you’ve never done it before (or had a bad experience in the past). But EMDR is different and worth considering if you’re tired of carrying around the same emotional weight.
The benefits of EMDR go beyond just “feeling better.” It’s about understanding your past, making peace with it, and finally moving forward.
Will AI Replace Counsellors? Why Human Connection Still Matters in Therapy
As AI technology advances, many wonder if it could ever replace the human connection at the heart of counselling. Explore what makes counselling uniquely human—and where AI fits in.
People have asked me whether I think AI will replace counsellors one day. It’s an understandable question in today’s world, where AI is showing up in everything from chatbots and virtual assistants to therapy apps and online wellness tools. As someone who values both innovation and human connection, I think it’s important to look at this honestly—what AI can offer, where it falls short, and why human counsellors are still irreplaceable.
AI is already making a meaningful contribution in the mental health space. For instance, AI-powered apps can help people track their mood, practice mindfulness, or access coping strategies around the clock. These tools can be especially useful between sessions or for those who may not have immediate access to a therapist. In some cases, AI can also support clinicians by analyzing patterns in journaling or speech, offering insights that may help guide treatment. And of course, automating administrative tasks like scheduling or sending out intake forms can free up more time for therapists to focus on direct client work.
But while AI has its place, it also has important limitations—especially when it comes to the depth and nuance required for meaningful therapeutic work. AI doesn’t truly empathize. It can mimic understanding through pre-programmed language, but it doesn’t feel or intuit the way a human does. It doesn’t pick up on the subtle cues in a client’s voice or body language. And most importantly, it can’t offer the kind of relational experience that therapy depends on.
Counselling is not just about strategies or problem-solving; it’s about being in a safe, trusting relationship where you feel seen, heard, and supported. Real transformation often happens not through advice, but through connection—with someone who can sit with your story, hold your pain, and help you make meaning of your experience. That kind of connection can’t be programmed.
There are also concerns about how AI responds in moments of emotional crisis. A trained counsellor knows how to assess risk, stay grounded in moments of intensity, and provide thoughtful, human-centered support. AI, while improving, is not equipped to make those same kinds of judgments with the care or responsibility that real people can.
So, will AI replace counsellors? I don’t believe it will—or that it should. AI can be a helpful tool, an added layer of support, or a way to expand access to mental health resources. But it will never take the place of what makes therapy truly healing: the relationship. At its core, therapy is about connection. And no matter how advanced technology becomes, the power of human empathy, presence, and understanding is something only another person can offer.
Are You Engaging in Distorted Thinking? How Cognitive Distortions Shape Your Reality
Sometimes the way we think can twist reality, leading to distorted thoughts that affect how we feel and act. Understanding these patterns is the first step to clearer thinking
Have you ever been absolutely sure of a conclusion—only to second-guess yourself later? Or has someone pointed out that your reaction seemed irrational in hindsight? If so, you may have been engaging in distorted thinking, often driven by something called cognitive distortions.
What Are Cognitive Distortions?
Cognitive distortions are automatic, habitual patterns of thinking that lead us to conclusions not fully grounded in reality. These mental shortcuts often "fill in the blanks" when we lack complete information, usually without us realizing it.
We all use cognitive distortions from time to time. They're part of how the brain tries to make quick judgments. But when left unchecked, these patterns can fuel anxiety, anger, and negative self-perception.
How Do Cognitive Distortions Work?
Cognitive distortions are especially active when we’re feeling anxious, angry, or overwhelmed—times when the brain’s reasoning center isn’t fully engaged. In these moments, we’re more likely to rely on emotional thinking or assumptions.
Example: Mind Reading
Imagine this: you see an acquaintance, wave hello, and they walk past without acknowledging you. You immediately think, “They must not like me.”
That’s a cognitive distortion known as ‘mind reading’—assuming you know what someone else is thinking without any real evidence. In reality, the person may have simply not seen you or been lost in thought.
Why Are Cognitive Distortions Harmful?
These distorted patterns often lead us to build emotional “cases” based on assumptions, not facts. Once a biased belief is formed, we unconsciously look for evidence to support it—strengthening the distortion and deepening the emotional impact.
Over time, distorted thinking can:
Increase stress and anxiety
Fuel anger or resentment
Damage self-esteem
Create conflict in relationships
Prevent clear, rational decision-making
How to Recognize and Challenge Distorted Thinking
Step 1: Learn the Types of Cognitive Distortions
Some common types include:
All-or-Nothing Thinking – “If I fail at this, I’m a total failure.”
Catastrophizing – Expecting the worst-case scenario.
Overgeneralizing – “I always mess up.”
Labeling – “I’m such a loser.”
Should Statements – “I should always be in control.”
The more familiar you are with these patterns, the easier they are to spot.
Step 2: Identify the Thought
When you notice a strong emotional reaction, pause and ask:
“What was I just thinking?”
“Is this thought based on facts or assumptions?”
Step 3: Challenge the Thought
Use a cognitive distortions worksheet or challenging questions tool to help you reframe your thinking:
“What else could explain this situation?”
“Would I say this to a friend?”
“What evidence do I have that this thought is true—or false?”
Final Thoughts: Reclaiming Clarity and Emotional Balance
Distorted thinking isn’t a flaw—it’s a habit. But it’s one that can be changed with awareness, curiosity, and consistent practice.
By learning to recognize cognitive distortions, you can take a powerful step toward clearer thinking, improved emotional regulation, and healthier relationships—with yourself and others.
Additional Resources:
List of cognitive distortions.
Challenging questions worksheets: a shortened version and a longer version with examples.